Chicago Math Test

[Whig]

They are designing math tests specifically for Democrat controlled cities like Chicago now. How great!

Chicago Math Test:

NAME______________________________

STREET NAME_________________________

1) Jose has 2 ounces of cocaine. If he sells an 8 ball to Antonio for $320 and 2 grams to Juan for $85 per gram, what is the street value of the rest of his hold?

2) Rufus pimps 3 hos. If the price is $85 per trick, how many tricks per day must each ho turn to support Rufus' $800 per day crack habit?

3) Jerome wants to cut the pound of cocaine he bought for $40,000 to make a 20% profit. How many ounces will he need?

4) Willie gets $200 for a stolen BMW, $150 for stealing a Corvette, and $100 for a 4x4. If he steals 1 BMW, 2 Corvettes, and 3 4x4's, how many more Corvettes must he steal to have $900?

5) Raoul got 6 years for murder, he also got $10,000 for the hit. If his common-law wife spends $100 per month, how much money will be left when he gets out?

**Extra credit question: How much more time will he get for killing the ho that spent his money??**

6) If an average can of spray paint covers 22 square feet and the average letter is 3 square feet, how many letters can be sprayed with 3 eight-ounce cans of spray paint?

7) Hector knocked up 3 girls in the gang. There are 27 girls in his gang. What is the exact percentage of girls Hector knocked up?

8) Bernie is a lookout for the gang. Bernie has a boa constrictor that eats 3 small rats per week at a cost of $5 per rat. If Bernie makes $700 a week as a lookout, how many weeks can he feed the boa with one week's salary?

9) Billy steals Joe's skateboard. As Billy skates away at 35 mph, Joe loads his 357 Magnum. If it takes Joe 20 seconds to load his Magnum, how far away will Billy be when he gets whacked?

[waterman]

We moved out of Chicago when school was out in May, 1950. I was 9. We never moved back, so I don't have any idea what all that stuff means. But my father's sister (my aunt) was a clerk at the Cook County Elections Department. When we left, we moved to Ohio. But my parents continued to vote in every election. Dad died in 1972 (age 63), but voted until 1988. That's when my aunt died and we lost contact. At family dinners, my aunt would announce that, once again, Dad survived both cancer and cremation to carry out his civic duties.

[Dick Hosmer]

Same story in my family! Had a fiesty red-haired aunt, who worked as a paralegal in a small law firm - into her 90s, she never told her boss how old she was! Her mission, every election cycle was to go to "city hall" and remove her dead parents from the voting rolls. Their quadrennial resurrections were nothing short of miraculous!

On a more serious note, we have "joked" about Cook County for years, and yes, the stories are amusing - BUT - the fact that it goes on, and is permitted to go on, is a national disgrace. WHEN are we actually going to DO something about it? Are we ever, or are we just going to rot from the inside like Rome? You KNOW the 2024 election is going to make 2020 look like child's play. The Nazis (sorry, mean Democrats) have had four years to perfect their cheating, and, since they got away with it once, it should be easy to do it again. I'm depressed . . .

[waterman]

Agreed that it is a national disgrace, but it probably is confined to densely populated urban areas which were going to vote socialist no matter who was running. Chicago controls the whole rest of Illinois, just as other big cities control the voting outcome in other states. At present, the Electoral College is our only hope. It is all that keeps us from Mob Rule, and that's the socialists short term goal. Long term goal is get rid of the Constitution and replace it with a socialist dictatorship.

I see 2 alternatives: #1: Create "city-states", separating NYC, Chicago, LA, Houston, Seattle. Portland, and several others from the rest of their states. They get 2 Senators & proportional representatives. The separated states get their 2 senators & reps.

#2: Vote in person, with voter ID, with only recognized absentee voting (housebound, cripples, etc.). Vote in English only, except in states where Spanish was made legal when state was admitted to union. Must be of sound mind, but don't know how to administer that one; Some sort of literacy test required to get voter ID. But polling places must be accessible to all, in EVERY neighborhood.

#2A: Multiple votes: Every person (#2) gets a basic vote. Single multiple votes added for:
(2nd vote) education (recognized university, technical or trade school);
(3rd vote) military service (how many years minimum? 4? plus good paper discharge or active);
(4th vote) responsible parents, raising 2 or more kids to age 18 without any of them going to jail, etc.);
(5th vote) economic contribution (owning & running a business that employs 5+ people full time);
(6th vote) being a positive influence in community: school teacher, minister, medical occupation, runs the homeless shelter, etc.;
(7th vote) for being a hero of some sort, military or civil: develop cure for cancer, Alzheimer's, solve homeless problems, etc.) 7th vote is made very special.
Any person can have up to 7 votes, but no more.

If we don't do something like this, we're headed for civil war.

[Whig]

I think it's funny how my Chicago street gang joke devolved into contemporary voting issues!